5月22日

髻
琦君 ( 1917~2006 )

人世間，什麼是愛，什麼是恨呢?
母親已去世多年，垂垂老去的姨娘，
亦終歸走向同一個渺茫不可知的方向，
她現在的光陰，比誰都寂寞啊。

我怔怔地望著她，想起她美麗的橫
愛司髻，我說：「讓我來替你梳個新
的式樣吧。」她愀然一笑說：「我還
要那樣時髦幹什麼，那是你們年輕人
的事了。」

我能長久年輕嗎？她說這話，一轉
眼又是十多年了。我也早已不年輕了。
對於人世的愛、憎、貪、痴，已木然
無動於衷。母親去我日遠，姨娘的骨
灰也已寄存在寂寞的寺院中。
這個世界，究竟有什麼是永久的，
又有什麼是值得認真的呢?

──選自《紅紗燈》

May 22

Hair-Knot
Chi Chun (1917 - 2006)
English translation: Zhi Yue

What is love and hate in this world? Mother had
passed away many years ago, and my maternal aunt was
also approaching old age, she would eventually head
for the same unknown destination Her days now were
lonelier than anyone else’s.

I looked at her helplessly, remembering her beautiful
hair-crossed knot. “Let me help you comb a new
hairstyle,” I said.

She replied with a sad smile, “Why would I want such
fashionable hairstyle? It’s what you young people do.”

Will I be forever young? It has been ten years since
she had spoken these words. Youth is no longer at my
side. And I am no longer concerned by love, hate, desire,
and ignorance. The day Mother left me is but a distant
past. My aunt’s ashes have also been registered in the
same lonely monastery.

After all, what is permanent in this world? And what
is there to take so seriously?

── from Hong Sha Deng (The Lamp with a Red Shade)